This cycle we repeat and repeat and repeat

Your life is fast. My life is fast. We have work and children and activities and obligations and cooking and cleaning. We go to the gym. We go to work. We drive. We wave to our neighbor. We unpack from the day behind us and prepare for the day ahead of us. And at night we collapse into our bed in exhaustion, only to be awakened by an alarm buzzing in our ear. The cycle continues. We do it all again.

We are working to better ourselves, to improve our lives. We want to work out more, cook more meals at home, spend more time with our loved ones. We want to save more, earn more, vacation more. But we’re in this cycle and this cycle is fast. We try to pull these pieces into our routines, into our lives, into these cycles that we live through. But suddenly the days become weeks and the weeks roll into months and into years. Suddenly ten years have passed and then more. And where did they go? When do we take moments to pause, to reflect, to dig deeper and understand, or to step outside of ourselves and look back at the person we have become.

We wake up today the same person we were yesterday because of these routines, these habits, these cycles. We are so firmly associated to the person we were yesterday and the day before and the day before and the month before and the year before. The idea of any change is scary and daunting. It may be a place we don’t want to visit because it can be complex, and we don’t have energy for more complexities in life. It requires us to step back and look at ourselves, to dig into our motives and understand our values and the chatter happening within our minds.

So instead of tuning in to what’s going on inside, we reach for our phone. We open up our computer. We browse the web and jump on Facebook or Instagram or whatever version of crack we choose. Because while many of these things are used to connect, to inform, to enlighten and expand, so many of us turn to them without realizing that they are quieting the inner voice. They dampen our connection to ourselves. We reach for something outside of us, something often times empty. The truth is that we have become strangers to ourselves.

So today, step away, tune in, sit in silence. And when the silence gets hard and you have to stop, keep going. The goal is not to have major epiphanies or life-altering moments, though you may have those. The goal is to clear out the corners of your mind, to feel the spaces you haven’t felt in a while. Do it today and do it tomorrow.

This isn’t the end. This is the first step.